Screwed Kenosha Style

#3204H-001 Bunk 41
Kenosha County Jail
March 19, 2004:

Dear Family:

I am sorry that these letters are so sloppy, but in jail the only writing device an inmate can get is a pen that looks like the cheap insides of the Bic pens. You don't get the stiff housing which could be used as a weapon, but only the flimsy inside and only about 1/2 that length. Last letter was really messy, I'll try harder to write with this rope.

I am getting used to it here. Don't feel sorry for me, there are many nice police, guards and sheriffs entering the room several times a day. There is one man that when he first mad his appearance I thought this jail was really going to be the pits. He is tall, shaved head and looks very military style, but after watching him he is a very nice man. He is orderly and wants everything military fashion. If your bed is not made perfect during the day and he steps in, he writes you up. If at about 10.00 p.m. he surprise visits your room and you are not on your bed, he writes you up. Now I think when you get the second warning it will not be a warning, but you go to the "hole." People would think that such a man is the greatest X@!#%, but I disagree. All he is doing is setting some capable rules. If he told me to make a head dive off the top of my bunk3 times a day, well then I would think he would be that rectum, because that would be impossible. He is setting rules that are possible. I just wish he would go over and teach Judge Mary K. Wagner how to make possible rules. She got mad because I didn't even attempt to jump off of the silo three times a day. It is an impossible task that she gave me. But this man is the worst and yet I see him as a very nice man, the same as all the others.  There are women too! There is on woman in the morning that also puts on a front as being mean, but even she is a teddy bear inside.

If I had no debts, didn't owe anybody any money (which agonizes me), I think I could even learn to like this place. Most of the inmates are from 17 years to 30 years old. There is one 50 year old and one 45 year old and then I think I am next. Just to think I'm the third oldest turd on this misfit pile, makes me feel old!

In the last letter I mentioned about missing the animals. Under closer observation I think I found some here. Some act goofier then any animal I ever seen. They bob and bounce and howl and grunt like nothing I ever seen before. I was raised on a farm, but some surpass anything I ever experienced.

Thank you and I Love and miss you all

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Bernie Tocholke
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Hinckley, MN 55037




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